June 19, 2013

Having the Courage to connect

What I’ve realized over the past few years in business is that in order for you to become successful and actually accomplish something that you have been dreaming of doing for years, your dreams and aspirations, you need to be a person of action. The biggest part that I’ve learned that holds most of us back from valuable relationships and things that we really long for is courage, our focus and determination, and it ultimately affects your ability to connect with others.

Most of us, including me as some point was or is still afraid to connect with people because of a few reasons, but the number one reason is the fear of rejection. Most people also are truly unprepared for the unknown and have a limiting self-image, or a low self-esteem. Quite frankly there are only a few reasons why we miss out on opportunities and connections that can change our life forever.

  • Being Unprepared – Remember when you were in high school or in college and you were supposed to give that all important speech in front of the class, or you were in the board room and you were the leader of the project, or when you were supposed to turn that report into your boss, and you were just unprepared. You had no idea what you were going to do and you really didn’t want this day to come. Remember that Interview you went on and you knew it was way over your head? You were unprepared! Which leads to becoming overwhelmed which leads to you backing out or falling flat on your face.
  • Fear of Rejection – This is a common feeling for everyone. Most of us guys are rejected at an early age because the girls, teen girls, and then adult women are constantly rejecting us. So we should become accustomed to it correct? Rejection when speaking with someone is the biggest reason for quitting and quitters. Then comes poor management. So how do you overcome the fear of rejection? The best way is to feed yourself with positive images and messages and bask in the joy of acceptance be prepared mentally that each person that tells you NO brings you that much closer to a YES.
  • Limited Self Image – If you think you are not worthy or up to the task, or feel that you don’t see yourself as being on the same level as someone else in order to connect with them, then you probably don’t. You have already taken yourself out of the game mentally and you have checked out. Its called Self sabotage.
  • The Secret – People are all just the same. We are creatures of habit and we tend to do the same things over and over and speak to the same people over and over, and hang out with the same people over and over. Guess what? The self-image that you have painted of yourself is a mental one. YOU created it. Maybe you should invest in some self-help and self enhancement books, music, CD’s and DVD’s. Once you begin to build your own image, your confidence will grow along with it. You must picture yourself ahead of time in the situation and having a positive outcome. I do it all the time for my speeches.

Remember when you learned to walk as a baby you kept falling down, but you got back up again and tried again. This is how you need to help your mental state. You need to feed your mind with positive images and audio daily. You need to make sure that it’s always being fed with positive information. The biggest barrier in making true life long connection is your mental state of fear against determination. Do you know what all this fear does it manifests itself in the form of procrastination. When you begin to procrastinate, you will only overcome that procrastination and the pain is so great that you had to take some kind of action.

Remember that practice make perfect and we need to make sure that we have our minds fed right!

Question: What drives you to connect with others?  or What stops you from connecting?

Lincoln Parks is a Network Marketing Professional that is Building his business using the Internet to Leverage his efforts. To partner with him visit http://www.platinumleverage.com

About Lincoln R Parks

I am a Traditional and Non-Traditional Business owner. I made the transition from Corporate cubicle to Home office. I went to work harder on myself than I did on my Job, and went from Darkness to light. I spend my days Consulting, Teaching, informing, & Learning. God has given me a spirit of Humility and a mind for Business, so I use that ability to reach others.
Lincoln R. Parks

  • http://www.tatumcapital.com Ed Tatum

    Great content! The fear of rejection and fear of no ring true for so many in our industry. Great stuff. Keep it up.

    • http://www.lincolnparks.com Lincoln Parks

      Ed, that is exactly why i wrote this article. So many people want so many things but the FEAR of rejection stops them. Mark Yarnell calls it the rejection rocket. Thanks so much for the comment!

  • http://jimcoffmanblog.com JimCoffman

    Great post as usual my friend. 1 of my team members told me last week that her mind was right but sometimes her body doesn’t want to cooperate. I had to tell her that if your mind was right, then your body doesn’t have a choice. Keep up the great work Lincoln. Talk soon.

    • http://www.lincolnparks.com Lincoln Parks

      Jim you are absolutely correct with that my friend. It takes hourly, daily, weekly, monthly and yearly commitment to working on yourself and it never ends. Your mind controls everything you do and say. Thanks so much for your words of wisdom. Your team is privileged to have someone like you.

  • Anonymous

    I enjoy being around other people. Over the years I have sharpened my people skills and feel confident in connecting with just about anyone. My drive to connect with others comes from my desire to help and add value to others.

    Having people and conversational skills are essential. Great points.

    • http://www.lincolnparks.com Lincoln Parks

      Dan, this was a very crucial skill for me seeing that my Industry requires us to connect. What types of things did you do to sharpen your skills in connecting?

 
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